I've wanted to go back to get my PhD since 2008 when I finished my masters degree. That year, Ray and I had just gotten married, bought a house, and were settling in to married life. Taking a paycut to go back full-time was not feasable and I didn't want to go back to school and work because I knew it would be difficult. In other words, it just wasn't the right time.
So I began teaching and loved it. I still kept the doctoral program in my mind and we kept trying to prepare ourselves financially and mentally in hopes that I could one day go back to school full-time... As usual, life happened, dreams got put aside, and of course... it still just wasn't the right time.
When I learned that my services were no longer part of the overall budget in my county and that I could potentially be without a job, I panicked. I cried. I questioned God. With the help of my family, I came back to my senses and created another plan. A plan that would involve me applying to graduate school, getting licensed in another teaching area, and looking for jobs. For months I was left with the unknown of what I would do the following year and I asked God to protect me and my family and provide a way. I also asked him for patience and faith because I knew that He was the ultimate decision maker of my fate.
For the past 2 years, I have experienced periods of uncertainty. In the midst of the storm, God taught me to patience and faith. I've been teaching in my new area for a year and have almost completed my first year as a doctoral student! This year has been busy, but I feel like all of the events that occured over the past year have helped me realize my calling...
So again I prayed. I thanked God for making things ok, for giving me a job, and for finding a way for me to go back to school. I also told Him that He had given me to much and although I was doing well, I wasn't happy. I still wanted to go back to school full-time. I once again asked him for faith and patience and to find a way for me to concentrate solely on my studies. And he did...
In November, I learned of a scholarship/fellowship that would provide comprehensive pay to 4 doctoral students in the area of special education/teacher education AND it was at my current university. I once again gathered the materials, submitted them, and waited. I interviewed in January and waited 3. long. months...
On Good Friday, I learned that I was accepted in to the scholarship/fellowship program! I cried. I fell to my knees. I thanked God for finding a way!
I've learned that God indeed had a plan for me, but I had to wait for the right time. I had to trust Him. I had to have faith. I had to have patience.
-Jeremiah 29:11
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